self care

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Posted by Mary Ann Copson (4.249.231.155) on 13:54:45 06/09/04

When we moved from New Jersey to the outback of central Virginia, we had 3 cats. Then through a quirky twist of fate - we ended up with many, many more (at one point it was about 30! good thing we live in the country).

A few weeks ago, one of the original cats died. She was about 14 years old and had been getting frail for the last couple of years. However, she was still feisty and made sure that we did not forget to feed her several times a day is the way she liked it. Luckily - for her and myself- I had the good sense to recognize that I had to be very conscious in taking care of her. She was persistent in following after me and meowing in a very high-pitched manner. She could easily become the "most annoying cat in the world" and she could also be the dear sweet matriarch who deserved extra special treatment. My family would often good-naturedly chastise me for spoiling her. But really - why not?

The day before she died she was just her normal self. The next morning, my son-in-law noticed that she was not looking so good. I went outside to get her and give her breakfast and some medicine that I would give her when she got a bit down. When I picked her up from her spot in the flower garden she started purring. But there is an energy about an animal when they are dying and I knew right away that she was. I held her, cried, and put the medicine away.

For the next 5 1/2 hours my daughters, my two grandchildren, and I sat and held her. We sat with her while she slowly left her body. She did not seem to like it when we tried putting her down so we just put everything else aside and stayed with her. She purred for hours but after awhile the purring stopped and we knew the end was near. She died in the early afternoon. Just like the Greek saying she died young as late in life as possible.

She has become my model now for self-care be as persistent as you have to be to get your needs fully met with all the perks you want. I tell her brother that now that she is not leading the way he will need to get himself out there and be up front about what he wants treats and all. And just this afternoon, he showed up meowing for his lunch when I went to get mine. We all can only be so lucky when those we take care of keep reminding us of what they need and what we need to do for them. Listen and you will reap the rewards of deep connection.

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Comments:	: When we moved from New Jersey to the outback of central Virginia, we had 3 cats. Then through a quirky twist of fate - we ended up with many, many more (at one point it was about 30! good thing we live in the country). : : A few weeks ago, one of the original cats died. She was about 14 years old and had been getting frail for the last couple of years. However, she was still feisty and made sure that we did not forget to feed her several times a day is the way she liked it. Luckily - for her and myself- I had the good sense to recognize that I had to be very conscious in taking care of her. She was persistent in following after me and meowing in a very high-pitched manner. She could easily become the "most annoying cat in the world" and she could also be the dear sweet matriarch who deserved extra special treatment. My family would often good-naturedly chastise me for spoiling her. But really - why not? : : The day before she died she was just her normal self. The next morning, my son-in-law noticed that she was not looking so good. I went outside to get her and give her breakfast and some medicine that I would give her when she got a bit down. When I picked her up from her spot in the flower garden she started purring. But there is an energy about an animal when they are dying and I knew right away that she was. I held her, cried, and put the medicine away. : : For the next 5 1/2 hours my daughters, my two grandchildren, and I sat and held her. We sat with her while she slowly left her body. She did not seem to like it when we tried putting her down so we just put everything else aside and stayed with her. She purred for hours but after awhile the purring stopped and we knew the end was near. She died in the early afternoon. Just like the Greek saying she died young as late in life as possible. : : She has become my model now for self-care be as persistent as you have to be to get your needs fully met with all the perks you want. I tell her brother that now that she is not leading the way he will need to get himself out there and be up front about what he wants treats and all. And just this afternoon, he showed up meowing for his lunch when I went to get mine. We all can only be so lucky when those we take care of keep reminding us of what they need and what we need to do for them. Listen and you will reap the rewards of deep connection.
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Dr. Carl A. Hammerschlag, M.D., CPAE, psychiatrist and author, is a professional keynote and motivational speaker. He speaks on a variety of topics including healthcare, mind body and spirit, health and wellness, mental healing and leadership. He has delivered motivational and keynote speaches to corporate and business clients around the world.